Crashing into the new year, toddler chaos, kid activities, weekends, and the ongoing search for the potentially imaginary "downtime"

I'm definitely not feeling any sort of "new year energy" - I think for me that maybe comes in August?  I wish I had it in January, but mostly I feel like new year more sleep (not a goal, a biological necessity).

Return to school and work has been... fine.  I think my brain is broken and I probably should have taken a sick day or something because I definitely did not perform at 100%, or even 30% this week.  I feel like I started to get into my work at about 11am this morning and now it's the weekend (in this context, 3 days of childcare) and I am already lacking in patience for kid shenanigans.

The 5 & 7 year old are also tired from their reentry into school.  This afternoon Lily did the classic crying walk home from afterschool club where she was freezing cold (because it was raining and freezing) but could only take one tiny step at a time (because she was tired) hence becoming more cold, and more wet, and more tired.  But - FYI - she was certainly not tired at 7:30 bedtime.  She told me.

The twins are completely thriving with our nanny.  She does all the amazing toddler focused play and chat that bores me to tears.  I am trying to figure out how to use more nanny help to destress my life, but even if we ask her to work on a weekend we still need to find something for the big kids.  Also, the dream for Rachel hobbies is quiet time in the house, which necessitates kids out of the house.  I think in the summer we will be at the age that we could perhaps ask her to take all the kids to the park... but for now there's just a lot of kids at home.  All the time.

Also, our house is a clutter chaotic mess.  We've used January sales to top up on things we need, but not yet put all these things away.  For instance, we bought new shelves for the kids rooms, but the one thing you certainly can't do with kids around is put up shelves.  

I was listening to a podcast where someone said "it gets harder as it gets easier" and I feel that is where we are at with the twins.  They are easier - they don't need constant 100% attention or they will die - but they are harder.  They need stimulation and they have opinions.  Clara does NOT want to get in her car seat sometimes and it's nearly impossible to get her in.  Aubrey will ONLY WEAR TIGHTS AND A JUMPER and I cannot seem to explain that tights are not leggings or trousers and need to be worn with a dress.  Andy is way better at doing 2 year old life, but I find it tricky.

Also, on the theme of ever diminishing "me" time, we signed up for weekend kid activities.  After being a weekend activity-free family for 7 years the kids started tennis lessons in November.  They love it.  I love them running around.  I love having a bit of structure to the weekend.  I like the other families in tennis lessons.  

BUT... our weekends now have a Saturday morning activity that is definitely not for all 4 kids.  So we split the kids, but then neither parent gets down time.

Because I am a glutton for bad scheduling, I signed the big kids up for a trial of small class swim lessons on Sundays... at 9am.  Again, single kid activity, which means neither parent gets downtime on Sunday morning either

Further decreasing the downtime is that we have double birthday parties this weekend - Ezra and Lily have one on Saturday afternoon (it's Ezra's classmate, but I asked if Lily could come for logistical reasons) and then Lily has one on Sunday afternoon (at the same place as the Saturday party.  It's a gymnastics party, which is actually a pretty decent kid party venue).

All weekend slots are now taken up with activities such that, even if it were possible for one parent to watch 4 kids, we don't have any time in which to do this.  I foresee a downtime-less weekend.

No wonder I am so tired every Monday.

Maybe also if I can't do the stuff I like, I may as well like the stuff I do.  I may as well enjoy watching my kids learn to swim and maybe have some nice parent chats at the party.  I've invited some new friends over for a play date on Saturday morning while the big kids are at tennis, they have one two year old so our two year olds can play together.  It's not as good as a long run or a bike ride or being in the house alone, but, as my dad would say, "it's better than a punch in the face, depending on who is doing the punching".

I don't really get that saying either.

Oh, and a photo to leave you with!  This is the classic online grocery order.  I ordered one leek and one zucchini.  And obviously I wanted a leek 3 times the size of the zucchini right???  What is this monster Leek?

Sunday random - cold snap, house projects, hairbrush, misc shopping.

Well we made it to Sunday everyone.  16 days off work.  I did enter the holiday with a bit of fear, and it turns out it was well founded fear because that wasn't the best holiday ever.  16 days in the winter is a lot of winter days.

I didn't get any sports in this week, I didn't do any planning, I didn't set any goals.  The house is kind of a tip (british for a mess)

I did go swimming with the kids a few times (not my favourite activity but an essential life skill) and on Saturday I took Lily to my favourite soft play with Aubrey and Clara and I enjoyed a peppermint mocha (first and last of the season, not sure I like the drink as much as I like the idea of the drink).

It's been brutally cold (for cardiff) hovering at around freezing.  There is a snow and ice warning today.  I can tell it's been cold because £30 is a lot to keep a house at 18c/65f during the day for 4 days:

Also, I did start another house project... because why not.  

Our lounge has long annoyed me.  It photographs well, but the curtains are A LOT.  They reflect the fact that we decorated in November.  

They looked good in November.  I finally found a new pair of curtains I liked enough, but it was £200.  Luckily it was down to £150 in the January sales! So I ordered the curtains in Sage.  When we hung it up it was a definite improvement, but I should have also tried Olive as the color was not perfect.  So I have now ordered the same curtains in Olive and carefully repackaged the Sage ones so we can return one... but in the interim my lounge now looks like this

Not ideal.

Also, I ordered a new hairbrush! Here is my current brush, was which gifted to me by my grandma when I was in high school:

I spent a LONG time looking at brushes.  I think the one that is most similar is this:

But that seemed super expensive and I couldn't face paying for shipping.  I also thought maybe a round ceramic brush would be a good idea?  Maybe the type of brush grandma bought when I was 12 isn't definitely the right type for the rest of my life?

So I bought this one:

And this one:

In unrelated news... We are currently borrowing a Air Frier.

I am not sure what to do with this air frier.  Andy used it to reheat a mince pie and it cooked it very fast! I am not sure we will keep it since we need counter space, but before we give it back i want to try cooking some things in it.  So far my ideas are

• Something with Tofu
• Aubergine/Eggplant thing?
• Salmon

Does anyone have an love an air frier and can send me your favorite recipe you use it for?  Is this like asking "What should I put in a slow cooker"? 

I'm back in work tomorrow, which I am feeling OK about.  I think it will be a hard day because the twins have gotten very used to having me around and are in a definitely mommy phase.  The big kids have started sleeping late.  I'm not looking forward to getting out the door, or the crying.  I'm not feeling at all rested after using almost 2 weeks of annual leave.  But whether I'm rested or enthusiastic or not, work starts at 8am and I'll have to remind myself that everyone probably feels much the same.

Goals Goals Goals! A Review of 2025 (spoiler alert - not done is the dominant theme)

 Oh Hey! 2025 is over! Let's have a review of my goals and how I did...

First, I think I only have one goals post from last year, and it's here.  I had a lot more goals than this, but apparently never got to blogging them.  So... how did I do?

Personal

Paint my Nails Monthly
    Yes. I've been pretty good about this... mostly if I can do it during a work meeting on teams.

Train for a 1/2 Marathon
    Yes. I trained and ran it.  I'm not super pleased with how the race went, or being really ill the week beforehand, or doing only 2 of the 3 training runs a week... but I did it.

Improve Accessory Situation.
    Nope. Have not bought, worn, or thought about this.

Strength Train 100 time
    Nope.  I did 85. Oh well.

Ride 50 miles in one weekend
    Nope. Did not do this or find a weekend where I could even try this.

Buy a blazer or jacket to classy up work clothes
    Nope. work clothes are sort of worse than ever.

Take a skills class at bike park wales
    Nope. I just couldn't find a day for it.

Go To Paris
    Nope. Postponed to next year or the year after or some other time

Take a bread making course
    Nope.

Take 15 in person yoga classes
    Nope.  But also the yoga studio I liked closed down.  I did 6.

Learn to style my hair, buy a new hairbrush, and potentially a new hairdryer
    Medium I got a hair drier, learned nothing about my hair, and even my husband thinks I need a new brush because now about 30% of the bristles are missing from my existing hair brush.

Professional

Grow professional network - reach out to 5 people

    Poor. I reached out to 1.  We had a good call and then nothing happened and neither of us pursued anything.

Spend 90 minutes a month on personal learning courses. 
    Nope. 

Document Successes Weekly and Monthly
    Medium... I have a bit of a monthly review going but work was weird and intense.

Mentor other people - figure out step forward for mentoring

    Medium - I had a mentee! For a few weeks until she quit.  So I guess that's not really a success and I haven't had headspace to move forward on this at all.

Family

Overnight trip with Ezra
    Nope.

Overnight trip with Lily
    Yes! Went to Bath

12 Adventures with Andy
    Yes... sort of.  Some of the adventures were a drink or lunch.  But I did manage to fit in 12 things that we did, including indoor climbing and a trip to Bike Park Wales.

See a theatre show with Andy or kids
    Yes - I saw a few this year, Andy and I went to Banff film festival.  I took the kids to a pretty average kids production of The Frog Prince.  We went to a kids ballet in Feb as well. 

House

Hang art in the office

    Yes... and then we moved rooms and now I still need to hang art in the house (there's less art than the end of last year)

Replace toilet paper holder downstairs

    Nope.

Improve lighting - buy a new lamp

    Nope.  If anything it's actually worse than last year, we now have light fixtures we don't like which also have burned out bulbs because we intend to replace them but haven't.

Replace bath panel

    Yes - but the new one we got (which was $$$!) is already falling apart so that is a mid fail.

----

So... that was a year of random goals rarely achieved.  But even so, many of those goals were to dos, and they can stick on the to do list this year.

Because I am in a January funk I don't really have many goals for this coming year yet.  Which is fine, because days pass and at some point I can make goals again.  Maybe surviving 2 year old twins (and hopefully making some nice memories with the 5 and 7 year old!) for another year will be success enough.