November Nots / November Notes

It's November. We survived birthday season.

I've decided this is a month of nots. 

Last November/Dec was  way too busy.  We had a way too hard Christmas, and if I'm being uncharitable with myself then I would say that my energy levels have not fully recovered since Christmas last year.

It turns out, I was actually more aware than I thought of my own overexertion when I wrote in December of last year "I have lots of fun stuff planned in December and I am kind of dreading a lot of it."

Oops! Foreshadowing!

Rather than jumping straight from birthday season into Nov/Dec I decided to make a list of what I'm not doing

I am not doing Guy Fawkes day.  I'm not watching fireworks.  It was yesterday, Andy and the kids watched fireworks upstairs, it seemed like a lot of effort, one kid had a meltdown, and I thought "man I am glad I put no energy into this!"

I am not taking the kids to see the Fireworks at Caerphilly Castle.  Andy can take them! It's at 6:30pm on a Friday and I want to be at home putting twins to sleep and then chilling out.

I am not going to our local village christmas fayre or tree lighting.

I am not doing Thanksgiving.  We've done thanksgiving every year, and it's nice but also weird because we don't do it on Thursday since it's a work day, and we don't invite people, and really it's just a turkey dinner in November in a country that isn't excited for it at all.

I am not adding anything to the calendar that is not already there 

I am not in charge of decorating for Christmas

What am I doing in November?

Scheduling Rest.  Which is somewhat impossible.  But on Monday I am staying overnight in Bath before an early office day.  I'm staying in a hotel with a pool and a sauna.  I'm going to have a quiet evening just for me.  I'm so excited.

Less.  Doing less.  When given the choice between making the effort and not making the effort I am choosing not.

Thinking how to re-incorporate hobbies into my life.  I haven't kept up with a lot this year.  I haven't gone mountain biking once.  I haven't gone running.  I've not kept up with photo albums.

Enjoying my new office mate, Helly the Skelly. Is this the kind of weird that people who work from home all the time become?

Mostly I'm trying to enter January refreshed and not totally burned out.  Contemplating what that would actually look like.  I don't want to be a homebody forever.  I don't want to be tired forever.  I like doing stuff, in theory.  I want to like doing stuff in practice as well.

Happy Halloween! Twins Third Birthday, Pumpkin Carving Party, The Official End of Birthday Season

We have officially survived birthday season now that these two chaos monkeys are THREE

We went back and forth about a party... they LOVE a party.  But also, they don't go to nursery and they have very few little three year old friends because third-time parents don't have time to make friends for all the kids they have.  

We also have a favourite party which is our annual Pumpkin Carving Party.  We started this tradition in 2022 (according to photos, although possibly earlier?), skipped 2023, and held one in 2024, 2025, and now 2026.

I have no idea how we actually threw a party in any of those years with the respective ages of our kids, although at least in 2022 we had a 2 and 4 year old only so that was easy.  In 2024 we had 1 year old twins as well, and you can extrapolate out from there.

We decided to combine the birthday pumpkin party and make it a bit smaller and on a Friday afternoon (their actual birthday).  In the morning they opened presents

Then we did a pumpkin trail in the local village

I managed a photo of all 4 kids

Then we had cake at home, and Aubrey and Clara went for a nap while Ezra and Lily watched a the Shaun the Sheep film and I set up for our party

90 minutes of effort later and the twins were up

I tried to keep the food low key but couldn't resist a mummy dogs:

I was also super excited to find this Halloween set at the charity shop for £2 last week!

Andy finished work at 3 and arrived to a party already in process

One take home for next year is that I need to pre-empty the kids pumpkins, because having people arrive while 4 kids yell at me to help prep pumpkins is a lot of chaos.  

Also I have to hope no one comes to our house to avoid chaos.

We did some Halloween crafts, decided we had enough chocolate without birthday cake, kids enjoyed a party meal and indoor picnic

Many pumpkin were carved

All in all twins had a fun birthday and I am glad we got to have a Halloween party for them this year.  As kids get bigger it gets harder to host in our house... something we learned last year when we invited 10 families and ended up with 22 kids running around our house.  

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I'm excited the twins are 3.  I was really looking forward to 2 and really last year was not my favourite year.  I wouldn't say I'm looking forward to 3, maybe out of trepidation, but I am looking forward to it not being last year.

Clara (L) Aubrey (R): Newborn (2023)

Clara (L) Aubrey (R): One Year Old (2024):

Aubrey (L) and Clara (R): Two Years Old (2025)

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One more day of October (Halloween!)  and then we are into Reflection/Celebration season.  I do have some hopes and goals for the rest of 2026... but mostly I'm happy to be through birthday season this year and hoping for a bit of calm in November before the chaos of December.

5 Photos / Randoms on a Friday (Gym, Walks, Shopping, Books, Lists

I guess this is my new blogging cadence - 5 random photos on a friday?

I am currently blogging from a relatively chill house, where twins are sleeping, and Ezra (8) and Lily (6) are playing some sort of den building game which seems to involve taking everything from their rooms and collecting it into a small space in the house to build new "rooms".  

The kids have an "inset day" (or 'Insect day' as Lily calls it) which means they are off school.  This morning we had some of their friends over and it was actually fine, mostly because the twins were still at nursery.  I even hoovered the house, which is a big big mess because our new cleaner is injured and not currently cleaning and I am very sad about that.

Anyways, a week of random photos is in order!

GYM

At the start of October I started a new gym "programme" where I split my workouts into Push / Pull / Legs.  It's been pretty fun and I've started actually recording my weights and that's been fun too, although I should really use some cool app rather than a forever Apple Note.  Last weekend I did legs at the gym.  I do gym once or twice a week and the other one or two are Peloton strength.  I really like this machine because I love lifting heavy things and when I don't have to lift myself I was able to leg press 160kg / 350lbs which seems like a lot! Or maybe its normal and feels like a lot.  Anyways, I figure if I ever need to lift up a car I could maybe leg press it because my lifting weights are nowhere near that high.  

It's a Sign

This building is on my walk to work and I always wondered what it was.  What is the Loss Management Group?  I imagined a group of counselors helping people work through personal losses, or maybe a warehouse of lost things, although I imagine it is probably a money thing. It seems like the Loss Management Group needed some Loss Management Support because the building is now up for sale.  Hopefully they don't sell at a loss.

Personal Style & Shopping Fails

I am an avid second-hand shopper for my kids.  Here's Ezra in secondhand trousers and a Boden jumper (which was free, the Vinted seller put it in with some other things I bought) and Lily in her Crew bee jumper and super stylish leggings (leggings were new because leggings for 6 year olds have a lifespan of 1 kid)

I am not as good at secondhand shopping for me.  I just don't have time, or things fit weird, and also we don't live in an affluent place where thrift stores have lovely things.  If I was back in my hometown (Marin County, California) I would be all about the thrifting.  

Anyways, I recently bought myself a new jumper and wore it to work on Thursday and on the way home it got a hole! I was so annoyed I had ChatGPT write an email to the store (Boden) and Boden replied immediately with a refund.  I was very impressed with the customer service, but would have been more impressed with a long lasting jumper.

Reading

I absolutely trudged through Kamila Shamsie's Best of Friends because it was for book club. Book club started in January and we have read some great books.  I got the sense going into this book club that we were going to do less book talking so as to be more inclusive to everyone as not everyone has the same taste in books.  

Book club was on a Wednesday night and we ended up not talking about the book at all (not everyone read it) and even though it was a not very good book (IMO) I feel like I probably shouldn't have spent so much time slowly reading this book over the last fee weeks.  Also I probably shouldn't have gone out on a Wednesday to not talk about the book (I was up at 5:30am on Thursday for work, that was my own bad planning).  

The reading vs. not reading might be a common book club situation/dynamic.  Maybe I need to find (or start) a second book club with a book focus.

Now I'm back to reading The Night We Met by Abby Jimenez and it's lovely.  I'm not erudite in my reading, but I do love a good bit of thematic / analytical analysis from my (book) clubbing.

List of Lists

Lily has taken to making lists and I love it.  Here is one of her many Party (Prtee) lists.  I am always here for lists and for phonetic spellings

5 Photos / Randoms on a Friday.

This photo adequately sums up my life.  It's friday.  Twins are asleep.  I could be picking up the house, or putting away laundry, or doing any of the 500 million things (or, like, 20 things) on my to do list.  But if Helly the Skelly can sit and chill then I guess I can too.

Kids are weirdly in love with this skeleton.  We also bought a bag of bones to play with, because that's normal?  This weekend it's time to decorate for halloween.

Life continues to be busy! On Monday this guy turned EIGHT.  Grandma made a football cake.  Kiddo was more impressed than he looks in this photo.

Eight is GREAT.  I'll add that to my kid age rhymes:

See it through till two

Survive to five

Eight is great

Last weekend I took the twins to Castle Coch to look at leaves but the leaves hadn't changed a lot.  I am just ready for leaves!  It was an adorable expedition without leaves, and I even remembered to send a photo to Elisabeth for the Cool Bloggers Walking Club:

My mom is here right now and she brought a Trader Joe's care package and it is the best! I know I'm in my 40s but I can still love a care package right?  Also, how come it took me 15 years of living in the UK to realize that all I ever want from the US is everything from Trader Joes?

I have been weirdly curious about the Pilot Juice + Pen:

Because I couldn't find it in the UK I became more and more curious, and finally I ordered it from JetPens, which is a US pen company that imports from Japan, and had them sent to the US, and then ferried over to me.  The Japanese company had weirdly complicated customs fees and the Swedish company that seemed to import/export seems curious and sometimes you just need to go with what's easiest even if the easiest thing is shipping pens from Japan to the USA and then to the UK.  

They are fun pens.  I like writing things with them.

Do you have a skeleton in your house?  In your closet?  Do you like funky pens?  What about football cakes?

10 October Good Things So Far

I know I'm a basic human with basic likes and basic needs, but I love October.  It's possibly my favourite month of the year.  

This year we are having an exceptionally excellent transition into fall.  There have been clear blue skies and leaves are changing and we haven't had the relentless endless days of rain.  

I don't know if it's the blue skies or the right cycle day, but here are some things that are working for me right now.

1. Having a Cleaner Again

I said I was basic right?  

I randomly found a cleaner and she has come three times and she seems nice and normal.  She came on Wednesday and the house is still clean this evening and it means that my Rachel time tomorrow doesn't need to be spent cleaning the house! And I find that when my house is not a total dump I don't mind spending an extra 5 minutes organizing something small or wiping down a windowsill.  

I missed having a cleaner for the last two years.

2. Writing Texts on Apple Notes

I hate texting on my phone and typing on my phone.  

At night I will sometimes write a batch of texts out in Apple Notes on my computer and then transfer them into texts using copy and paste for quickness.  I realize I could use whatsapp web the same way but I still despise whatsapp and prefer text.  

It's also good for when I am up at very early o'clock in the morning but don't want to actually send someone a text at 4:30am, I put it in notes and send it at a human hour instead.

3. Cottage Cheese

I know I'm so so basic, but I have always loved cottage cheese.  

Recently Waitrose put this cottage cheese on sale and it was so good! I haven't found a UK cottage cheese I like so I was excited to finally find one.  And then I learned that cottage cheese is high in protein and it's a US obsession at the moment and I can see why because it's so tasty.  

4. Tofu and Tempeh

I am a little obsessed with tofu and tempeh.  Maybe it's my perimenopausal protein addiction, but I've also maybe started thinking about being a vegetarian and it seems I should probably learn to eat good veggie food and not just "not meat".  We'll see what happens.  

5. Kids in Costumes

It's just really cute!

6. Library Holds, Reading, TBR

I was excited to learn that Emily St. John Mandel has a new book out!  

But 228 people got there first:

7. The New Celebrity Traitors

It's just a great show! Andy and I have been watching it in chunks in the evenings while doing stretching.  British celebrities are so... odd.  

8. Early to bed, Early to Rise

Once or twice a week I've been going to bed at 8:30pm and waking up at 4:30am and it's made mornings feel delightfully long and lovely.  I've mostly used it for sport, but I'm also still working through photo album project and just enjoying a cup of coffee before the twins wake up.

9. Twins being almost 3.

I remember when Lily turned 2 life just started to feel easier.  Many parents say 2 is a bit of a milestone... there's probably a reason that the three year age gap is fairly common!  

I had been so excited for the twins to turn 2 for that same sense of relief... and then they turned 2 and relief didn't come.  I am hopeful that twins at 3 is what a singleton (that's what twin moms call single/non-twin kids... it's a word I did not know before) is at 2.  I think it's getting easier.  Finally.

10. House goals

Something about fall always makes me want to cozy and improve my house.  The next big purchase is single beds for the twins so we can finally get rid of the cotbed once and for all! I sense an IKEA trip in the future.  I also have dreams of putting an accent wall in the lounge... stay tuned.  I love cosyfying the house for fall....

What's working for you this October?

September in Review - One Month in One Post

September was a wild month.

Lily turned 6!

I flew to New York

I got back from New York and had a 2-day workweek, followed by a long weekend with Lily's birthday party among other adventures.

Our nanny was on holiday the next week... another 2-day workweek for me (not ideal!) and 3 days of childcare (also not ideal).  I tracked time for Laura's Time Tracking Challenge and she gave me some great feedback and ideas for surviving a childcare free week.  Mostly that I need to find some backup babysitters.  Anyone know any south wales based babysitters?

Everyone survived though, and it was fun to do some toddler things.  Obviously we hit up gymnastics

Over the weekend I took all 4 kids to St. Fagans Museum BY MYSELF while Andy had a bike ride (I went climbing with a friend on Saturday, so this was the trader-off).  St Fagans has my favourite swing ever.  I don't think they built it just my family but 2 big-kid swings and 2 little-kid swings is perfect for a family of 7 / 6 / 2 & 2 year old kids:

The next weekend We celebrated Andy's Birthday, of course I will not say how old he is because that would be rude...

Then Andy did an all day bike ride and I watched all the kids all day and it wasn't so bad! I picked up one of Lily's friends in the morning and took her to Lego Club with us at the library.  There was a sign on the wall that said "do not leave children unattended" which I thought was funny because one or more of my children are always unattended.  Two year old twins instantly means one does not have enough attending. 

On the Sunday we visited friends we haven't seen for over a year and a half and it was super nice to see them again.  We played in the forest and built a hut and had more cake

THIS WEEK

On Tuesday I went to London with work.  It was great to go away and the hotel was super nice (as in, it was not a Premier Inn... but anyone who stays in nice hotels would probably not think it was super nice... I guess I should say it's nicer than I'm used to!).  I went out to dinner with colleagues and met with people that were nice to see in person.

On Wednesday I was in the London office in the morning and then took the train back to Cardiff and went to a hipster wine and cider bar to meet Andy for a date night!  A year ago I booked tickets to the Banff Mountain Film Festival - I booked early and got great seats at a great price because time is the magic ingredient

We went to the same film festival in November 2025 because Kyria was over and I asked if she could babysit and she was a great sport and did! I remember it was a bit tricky getting out (twins were good-ish sleepers but I wanted to make sure they were down before we left) and we got to the show 5 minutes before it started and it was all quite... rushed.  And also awesome! 

When I booked tickets for this year because I figured that in a year life would be easier.

And then, honestly, kid stuff got much harder for about a year.  But our lovely Nanny agreed to work straight through to bedtime and so Andy and I met in town and she managed to do a 4 kid dinner and bedtime and we got back to an empty dishwasher and sleeping kids and it was amazing.  And now that we know she can run a 4 kid dinner and bedtime (FYI, I basically cannot run a 4 kid dinner and bedtime, so this is totally impressive of her) we can start to pick some more future date nights.

Then September was over.

I have basically stopped tracking things (ie sport) so I feel I can't do a "september by the numbers" but I do love those.  I did about 2 weeks of good Peloton workouts.  I did mostly track my food and sometimes not.  

I read two books, both good.  Road to Tender Hearts was really nice and in another stage of life I would probably have found it more memorable.  It was a fun read.

Dolly all the time was super fun and nice.  Nora Goes Off Script is still my favourite Annabel Monaghan book but really I can't think of any I don't like.

September was busy and chaotic.  October is busy too, but I'm really hoping it will be a routine-based busy and not a chaos based busy.  

I can do chaos.  I don't love it though.

Weekend in New York - all the family, all the bagels, the best flight, things I miss from the USA.

That was a much longer blogging gap than expected but I am finally here to recap my trip to New York!

SATURDAY

My flight out was at 7:45am, so I arrived at the airport at 4:45 because I like being early. I was super incredibly lucky on this trip because my frequent flier mom had used some upgrade points and I was upgraded to business class for the flight out.  

Before boarding I gave myself a little pep talk about how I was not going to look like a podunk fool when I got on the flight, and that I knew how to do nice things like be in business class.

We boarded the plane and I immediately clearly did not belong there when I asked "umm where is seat 4?"

I was so so excited to see my seat!  What a dream to spend 7 hours alone in my own space.

Some other people started to board including a guy in front of me who saw me grinning and looking around and asked what I was smiling about.  I said "OMG I have never been in business class this is amazing!  Do you do this all the time? And if you do, do you think "OMG is this amazing" every time you get on a flight?"

He took that well and said "I do try to remember how lucky I am" and then he helped me put the mattress on my chair because the chair was also a bed.

Anyways, I'm so far into this post without even being in new york yet.  The flight was so amazing, people brought me food while I watched TV!  I decided to watch The Paper (which is The Office reboot thing).  It was cute.

I slept a few hours as well, on a fully flat reclined bed.  I moisturized my face and I drank loads of water and I felt so human the whole time.  

When we started to land I told the flight attendant I did not want to get off the plane and wished the flight was longer.  Sadly they did not let me stay on the plane, but I also had a wedding to get to.

I went through customs, and it was the first time I had been back to the states since 2019, and it was a bit jarring just how big and diverse and also gun-y (ie police and customs) Newark airport is.  I hope that's not a weird political thing to say?  

The customs person asked where I was visiting from and I said "The UK" and he asked "how long have you been there" and I said I live there and then he stamped me through.

I met my mom at our AirBnB in Prospect Park (Brooklyn) and we went to the local coffee shop to get a coffee.  

Cold Brew with half and half! I LOVE half and half and they don't have it in the UK.  I also love cold brew, which they also generally don't have here (or at least I haven't seen it).  You can get iced americanos, but it's just not the same.  I am fairly sure I spent $30 at least on cold brew over my 3 days in New York and it was worth it.

Also look at all these cakes!  The Coffee Shop was called Der Pioneer and it was incredible

In the afternoon I walked around Prospect Park with my aunt, and then my sister arrived and we all went to a bar to meet my cousin as part of the wedding activities.  At around 7 I was ready to fall asleep on my feet, but I stayed awake until exactly 9pm and then was asleep within minutes.  I slept all night and it was glorious.

SUNDAY

I woke at 5:30am (8.5 hours of sequential sleep <3) and googled some things to do during the short visit.  The coffee shop opened at 7am and I snuck out for a coffee and some reading:

I was alone in the courtyard, the weather was perfect, and I was so fully content.  Plus I was excited to start thinking about planning!

Later that morning I walked through Prospect Park with my brother and mom - that park is HUGE!  There were so many people out running and cycling and enjoying life.  We went to a local farmers market where everything looked amazing:

We split up at 11 because I *really* wanted to go to a stationery shop.  There was a shop about an hour away doing a Hobonichi planner launch, which are a Japanese planner I have never seen but heard about from Best Laid Plans.  I decided it wasn't worth a 2 hour round trip, but there was also a stationery shop 15-minute walk away.

I walked by some classic Park Slope brownstone buildings:

And then remembered that this area is the setting for Kate Clayborn's Love Lettering!  

I finally made it to the Analogue Stationer which was super cute.  

I tried lots of pens and bought myself a Zebra Sarasa and a Good Pens pen, which were not expensive but are fun.   I also saw what a Hobonichi planner is, and they did look very cute:

We headed to Miriam for lunch with my family.  The food was incredible - my brother and mom had the Latke Benedict (eggs benedict on a potato latke), my aunt had watermelon salad, and my sister had another incredible salad.  I ordered chicken shawarma tacos with Za'atar fries and it was the best thing I've eaten in... a very very long time.

After my giant salty lunch it was time to get dressed for the wedding!  It was an afternoon outdoor wedding.  I think ChatGPT really came through with my wedding outfit:

The wedding was at Prospect Park and it was the most perfect day.  My cousin looked gorgeous, her friends were great, her husband is lovely, and the whole wedding felt truly "them".  I'm so glad I could be a part of it!

My brother and sister and I got home late, snacked on some New York bagels, and then went to bed.

MONDAY

I woke up in time for a coffee, and a $1 loaf end:

My mom joined me for this one, so it wasn't the same at the reading morning.

Then we went to a brunch with my cousin at her community garden, where I ate more amazing bagels (I have not listed all the bagels in this post but it was at least one a day).  We said goodbye and headed to the place I miss most from the USA...

TRADER JOE'S

I was so excited.  Sadly I only had a carry-on, so I took photos of everything I would have bought.  It was like my own fall Trader Joe's spree.

I did buy a few things though - these came back with me:

My mom and I took the subway (our first subway of this trip)

And from Penn Station we took a train to Newark.  I was able to catch an earlier flight home (5pm vs. 7:30) which was lucky because the 7:30 flight was cancelled.  Unfortunately these flights were full so there was no upgrade, and it was not the glorious experience of my travel out.  The flight ran out of food (is that a thing?) and I was in the back, and I didn't really sleep, and it was only 6 hours anyways.  

We left at 6:00pm New York time and arrived in Heathrow at 5:45am on Tuesday.

It was a truly incredible trip and I realized how much I love travel and how much I miss alone time.  I know this stage of 4 kids between 2 and 7 is a stage, but it is a busy stage.

Also, I thought about the guy on my flight out, and how mundane the experience of business is for him. He seemed reminded how cool it is to fly business by watching me excitedly explore a fancy airline seat.  I think maybe this stage of parenting is similar...  4 young kids is my mundane reality... but from an outside observer it's possibly pretty cool.   I would do well to remember this is highly time limited,  and perhaps try to approach my twin cuddle mornings with the same joy I approached my solo airplane seat.